Or possibly it was the result of a complex marketing study. Pros: This isn't just not a European name, it's an anti-European name. As corporate names go, "Red Bulls" is classier than, say, "Microsofts" or "Nutrilites" or "Big Seth's Plumbing and Radiators" would have been. Pros: "Seattle Sounders" is alliterative. (Not the best sales pitch I've ever made, I know.

It's revolting. Names like this give North American naming conventions a bad reputation and make people think calling their teams "Real Salt Lake" is a good idea.Verdict: The first authentically North American name on this list is not offensive, just ugly. On the other hand, it's really tacky, so screw it. “After a lot of discussion with Major League Soccer, we are confident it is in the best interest of our club and our supporters to take additional time to ensure a successful inaugural season,” said Tom Glick, President of Tepper Sports & Entertainment. There's a guy who was born to powerbomb opposing strikers through the ESPN Deportes broadcast table. And when the staff started to take it seriously, the young executive was too terrified to tell them it was an awful joke and they were all awful people for considering this. But did they make a big mistake in not going with Lazer Snakes? The team colors are black, white and blue - similar to the Carolina Panthers. Sporting Kansas City. Plus, the irony of naming a team based in the American capital "United" is worth a giggle every couple of weeks. It would be a lovely metaphor if those weren't, um, kinda stupid things to name a team after.

The team has also been setting records in the MLS due to its impressive … It isn't memorable, it isn't going to offend your palate, but it still makes you feel vaguely, indefinably rotten. I think I'm still hung over from New Years.).

© 2020 MLS. "Cons: The full name of the team is Club Deportivo Chivas USA, which translates as "Goats Sporting Club... er, USA." Come on, guys. HA! Pros: It has a long, glorious history behind it. The decision was made by MLS Commissioner Don Garber, in conjunction with the league’s Expansion Committee, to provide the club with an additional year to plan for the team’s launch.

"Let's call them... Dallas FC.

"Are they still around?" Some, like me, argue that those European names cheapen North American soccer traditions and hint that we all have a massive inferiority complex about our place in the world's game without luring in a single new fan. The Trojans start the year 1-0 with a victory over a region foe. I made it so subtle, you might have missed it. Major League Soccer also delayed the first seasons of expansion teams in St. Louis and Sacramento, California by one year each.

As European touches go, "United" is one that's generic enough to be harmless and even charming. To download this Excel XLS file list of the teams in the MLS (Major League Soccer), simply right click on the link below and “Save As” to save the file to your computer.

As early as 2013, the league had expressed a desire to expand …

I'm pretty sure this isn't Italy. Long-time MLS observers will recall that the team is named after C.D. "Union" is better than anything I could have come up with. Is this Italy? And Toronto's history is filled with great soccer team names: the Blizzard! Naming your club after a Mexican team is somewhat understandable when your entire raison d'etre is "bring Mexicans to MLS games.

Plus, the irony of naming a team based in the American capital "United" is worth a giggle every couple of weeks. Microsoft Excel XLS File of MLS Team Names. Admit it, you forgot about the Chicago Fire. Another rare example of an MLS team that sounds like it could be in a league other than MLS. If some mad Manchester United fan started up Red Devils United USA as an MLS team, I would be obliged to hate that name with the burning fire of a thousand suns. Shifting to 2022 pic.twitter.com/74eQrllBQa. And by "so long" I mean "one entry". Nobody could come up with a new for this new Major League Soccer team that was going to put Salt Lake City on the map as something other than "that place way too many flights stop over at." Pros: Simple and unambitious, but still looks like they're trying.

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